An Extract From my Historical eBook set in Victorian England. Available on Smashwords, Amazon, Barnes and Noble and Apple books.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Selfless-Susan-Williams-ebook/dp/B0876H1ZSD/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3L9UYZV7WI7ET&dchild=1&keywords=selfless+susan+williams&qid=1588805095&s=digital-text&sprefix=Selfless+%2Caps%2C163&sr=1-1

‘It’s gone twelve, you finished hours ago, where have you been?’ Gregory asked angrily.

‘A child was sick, and I had to stay with her while they went for the doctor.’

‘Well you’re here now. Sit down and hear me out. Do not get up, and do not speak. I am going to talk, and you will listen.’

Isabella sat on the chair by the window and he went and stood by the chair next to the fireplace and looking over at her said, ‘You are upsetting a lot of people Isabella and although I try not to interfere, I’m telling you now, you’ve got to stop this behaviour.’

Isabella stared at him and he loosened his collar slightly and his face went a sickly shade of beige. Isabella was a strong woman and he knew that she was going to come back at him with her sharp tongue.

‘You are right my love. From now on, I will express no opinions of my own. I will do nothing to upset your family and I will learn to know my place in this house. I will let you beat me as before and I will lie in our bed while you take what you want. Then I will cry myself to sleep with shame. Inside I will die a lonely death. But as before, if you are fulfilled, then I will do as you ask.’

‘Do not remind me of those terrible times. Yes, I was hateful then, but have I not been making up for it ever since? You taught me how to love Isabella and I’d hoped that we could leave the past behind us and move on, but it looks like you are determined to rake it up after all this time. These last six months have been hell for me. I’ve tried my hardest to be kind and patient, but you torture me so. If it were not for the fact that I know you love me Isabella I would throw you out tomorrow. No man should ever have to face the ridicule of his wife.’

‘Then divorce me and find another, because I have no intention of changing. Our life together is pointless and although you may not think of it in the same way as I, I know it is time to move on.’

‘Do you love me Isabella?’ he asked, as he walked over to her.

Isabella turned and looked out of the window and he gently put his hand on her cheek and turned her face back to his.

‘Look me in the eye and tell me that you don’t love me.’

‘I don’t love you,’ she said, as best she could.

‘I can see that you are lying Isabella, but I am at a loss to understand why. We have both been on a long journey to get to where we are now, why do you now deny your love for me. I can see in your eyes that you are lying. You are hurting me Isabella and you have got to stop this. I’m being driven mad by your heartlessness. Can’t we go back to how it was? We had something special, please stop torturing me.’ 

‘Too much has gone on in this house to make me believe that. I’ve tried to love you Gregory but it’s proving impossible for me to love you as I once did.’

Resigned to the fact that she was determined to end their marriage and emotionally exhausted he said, ‘Alright Isabella, as you seem set on spoiling this relationship, I’ll give you a divorce and although you may not want it, you will get a good settlement.’

‘Thank you.’

‘Don’t thank me. My heart is heavy and the only reason I am letting you go, is because if we don’t part now, there will be nothing left of what we once had. I want to remember the love we once shared. Leave whenever you like. You can move to the lodge for a while until you have somewhere to go. This is the last time you will see me. Will you continue your work with the farmers?’

‘If I may.’

‘Then make sure I do not see you. You may take Brent. Then he took her hands in his and kissed her knuckles, looked into her eyes and said, ‘I will set the divorce in motion with the lawyers, it’s a new law, so I don’t know how it works. So please bear with me. Please do not come back to the manor. If you need to contact me in any way, talk to my lawyer or send Brent.  I don’t want to see you again. You don’t know how much this hurts me Isabella. I’m going to leave now and if you don’t call me back, I swear to you, I will marry someone else within the year.’

‘Verity,’ she whispered.

‘Perhaps.’

Then Gregory bowed to her and left the room and even though she was hurting badly, she couldn’t bring herself to call after him. Gregory was not a man to break his word and she knew that his pride would never allow him to take her back. The realisation of this hit her hard and she sobbed uncontrollably. She had set him free to start over and it was killing her. She hoped that all this pain was going to be worth it and that he would have a family; because she didn’t want to go through all this heartbreak for nothing, for she loved Gregory dearly.

She could hardly breathe she was hurting so much, and she wanted to be sick. Every bone in her body cried out for him. If only she could just accept him at his word. He said he wasn’t worried about having children, but she knew differently by the way he doted on his nephews. He deserved a family, even though it looked like she would be denied that experience. But no matter how hard she tried; she couldn’t stop crying. She was never going to see the man she loved ever again, and it was all her own doing. If only she had given him an heir, things could have been so different.